It finally happened

[ailbhe]

I hit Linnea.

She's fine, I'm in shock. Alarmingly, I entertained the idea of asking her not to tell anyone for several seconds. There is no justification for it - it wasn't necessary, it wasn't helpful, it wasn't rational - I just lost my temper and didn't stop myself.

I think she forgave me quite quickly. Part of me is relieved; I'm getting this blasted, blasted implant out in a week anyway, and I've been dreading the possibility of losing my temper for months, and now I have, and she's ok with it. She was shocked and angry, which is good - she wasn't afraid or guilty-feeling.

Apart from being briefly shocking, it didn't much affect her behaviour for good or ill for the rest of the time before nursery.

I want to go to bed and cry.

Comments

[mrscosmopilite.livejournal.com]

sohope that you soon start to feel better about it.
I hope that comes over the way I meant. That you will soon feel better...argh I know what I mean

[ailbhe]

Naturally I assumed you meant "I hope you soon figure out a rationalisation as to why it was ultimately a beneficial action for your entire family and incorporate it into your regular parenting practice."

Or possibly I thought you meant "This too shall pass, and you'll all survive ok, and I hope that happens soon."

I'm strapping up my birch twigs even now.

[mrscosmopilite.livejournal.com]

ack no Birch twigs, limp lettuce leaf at worst. You will survive OK and so will the family. ou such a fabulaous job with those girls they really are a credit to you, forgive yourself just a little- please.