storbarnsförälder

http://ailbhe.livejournal.com/608880.html

Don't be strong, you mothers.
Scream for help. Be weak.
There in the strength of others
You will find the peace you seek.
Don't be strong, you mothers.
Cry out, cry long, cry loud -
Don't stand all alone with your baby
Weeping unheard in the crowd.
Don't be strong, you mothers.
Don't waste your strength on this.
Reach out, let others help you.
That's what they want. It is.

Don't be strong, you mothers.
Scream for help. Be weak.
There in the strength of others
You will find the peace you seek.
Don't be strong, you mothers.
Cry out, cry long, cry loud -
Don't stand all alone with your baby
Weeping unheard in the crowd.
Don't be strong, you mothers.
Don't waste your strength on this.
Reach out, let others help you.
That's what they want. It is.

We're getting off lightly:
No-one's been hurt.
At least, no-one's hurt badly.
At least, not at first.

We're managing well;
Both the children are fed.
At least, some food was offered.
At least, so someone said.

We're coping serenely:
The youngest survived.
At least, she has so far.
She seems quite alive...

Edit: this has now been posted in lnc as it oughter been. Oops.

Well, that's a bit of a surprise. Every copy of when baby runs I have in the house is ordered by someone, now, and I only have two fair and one damaged copy of before baby walks left. I must say I'm surprised at how fast people got their spake in. I hope you're not all horribly disappointed; I'm not sure the print quality of this is as good as the last one, though my original sample was the same. It might be that bulk orders are done on cheaper paper or something.

Anyway, in future both books will cost six quid each from me (once the two BBW I have left are sold, anyway) or £4.28 plus at least £1 shipping from http://www.lulu.com/ailbhe. Since I'm about to have a baby, it won't be faster to order from me, either, so there's no benefit to doing it that way at all.

Another 39 books, and I can buy the second one an ISBN. This is fun :)

when baby runs is now available from lulu.com. As they have changed their distribution systems, it doesn't have an ISBN yet; I thought sales of before baby walks would pay for it but the price has gone up considerably. They're both £4.37.

Shipping: International Economy shipping is about 4 US dollars (GBP2.36). I can get a bulk discount so might, if enough people order, be able to get books to people in the UK and Ireland for £6 and £6.50 sterling respectively. The shipping discount they used to offer appears to be no longer available, so I can't sell 'em for a fiver any more. I still have a few before baby walks for a fiver though.

Pre-orders of when baby runs: 10 at 11:10 Sunday [enough for a bulk order because of lower shipping for multiple copies! I will be plascing an order at some stage on Sunday]

[Memo to self: also 3 before baby walks, which is easy.]

We trikled to the library, pedalling in the rain, and we brought some books to Carol and we took more out again, and we trikled to the river, and we triked along its bank, and we triked behind some buses and a lorryload that stank, and we stopped to feed the goslings (who were bitten by the swans) and we didn't stop a-throwing till the bread we'd brought was gone.

We triked up to the playground and we stopped and ate our lunch and we played with many children and we liked it very much and we slid along the gravel and we sat and drank our tea and we tried to steal a toddler's shirt and we soothed another's knee, and we found a boon companion and they want us to come back and we triked back into town again along the cycle track.

We went into a toyshop - in fact, we went in two - and we tried to buy a coffee and we rushed to find a loo. We looked for clothes for baby and we didn't find a thing and we sat inside the trike and taught each other how to sing.

We ate a pleasant dinner while we strung a string of beads and we built a 'normous tower and we had some snuggly reads and we shared milk and a cuddle and we trundled off to bed and if we're e'er again this busy, I am going to lose my head.

There is a tadpole in my tum
It keeps me wide awake
And when the midnight munchies come
I must its cravings slake

The tadpole (size of a banana, about - 6 inches long, anyway, not incl. legs) is a swimmer. Not as lively as I remember Linnea being, and it has yet to respond to music in the same way, but then, it's almost two weeks earlier than the time Linnea got rhythm, so that's not proof it's a different person yet.

It moves differently though. Fewer long slow movements, more series-es of jerky kicks and periods of stillness.

Linnea likes my tummy; she talks to it, says "Baby i Mummy tummy; nife a fat!" and strokes it. One day recently she tucked her head under my shirt as I sat on the armchair and listened to my tummy for ages. She said she was listening to the baby, but I rather suspect what she actually heard was shepherd's pie (with carrots and peas) and soya ice-cream.

I fele very very tired, and my sinuses are clearly pregnant, but I'm in general very well. I expect to feel a lot better as the spring becomes more than half-sprung.

The Laughing Day

A long, long time ago, when you were very young
And all the world was unexplored and all our songs unsung
You lay nearby and looked at me - you'd only just begun
The day before had rained so hard. That day you brought the sun.

The day I cried the skies cried too -
The labour ward was grey
And the windows let no daylight in -
That was the crying day.

Your whole, long life ago, you lay and looked at me
And I woke up and your own face was the first thing I could see
And I looked into your blue eyes and saw the love to be
And a nurse came in and drew the blinds and the sun shone in on me.

The day I cried the skies cried too -
The labour ward was grey
And the windows let no daylight in -
That was the crying day.

The short, hard year has passed, and you still wake and play
And the days are long and full of joy and toys in disarray
You run and hide, then come to us, and without words you say
That from your waking to your rest, this is the laughing day.

I wanted to write how I felt and then I realised I'd already done it.

I have to examine you
But I will let you have
A sheet to drape over your knees,
A gooey latex glove

I have to examine you
There's no room for your mate
This stranger is a chaperone
Your husband can just wait

I have to examine you
It's not causing you pain
I think you're just too uptight
I'll start over again

I have to examine you
Come on, take off your pants
Get down there on the table
This student wants a chance

I have to examine you
You shouldn't want a choice
It's all for your own good, you know
It's good you've lost your voice