I feel squashed

[ailbhe]

Crossposted to plan_survive

I asked on a midwifery mailing list for recommendations of books with detailed information on c-sections. Most of the people on this list know my history, but someone who obviously didn't has emailed me to say "Have you considered a vaginal birth instead? Don't you know it's safer for mother and baby in more than 95% of cases?"

Before I could stop myself I answered with a big list of all my excuses for not having a vaginal birth this time.

And every single one felt like an excuse, not a reason, as I wrote it.

Is this normal? Am I the only person who tries to assume that people are doing what they are doing because it's the best option available to them, rather than because they're feckless idiots who can't be arsed to do things The Right Way? I know I don't always succeed in that assumption, but I try to.

I feel squashed. And guilty again, and I'm sick of feeling guilty about Linnea's birth. It's 9 days to her second birthday. *sulk*

Comments

[nicolechan.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry you had someone email you to bug you about your decision. Please don't feel bad for what you HAVE to do. You are doing the right thing and don't second guess yourself :)

I'm having one but it's not for the same exact reasons as you. I mean I didn't have any severe damage like you suffered. My baby was just plain too big the first time and she wasn't going to fit. There wasn't a way to get her out unless I had a cs. I feel like a loser for planning another one, but I'm so afraid of going through the whole labor process to find out, yup this one is too big also.