Not twitter

[ailbhe]

I started to say this on Twitter but had to stop.

There are things I want to do daily. But I need longer days.

I mean, things I want to do daily on top of minimal housework, childcare, cooking, etc.

In my head, I should be able to...

Get up, tidy my room a bit, get dressed, do ten minutes' yoga, put the mat away, make breakfast and feed everyone, clear up, get everyone else dressed, and be ready to leave the house by nine o'clock.

If I'm not leaving the house, I should be able to do the laundry and dishwasher, read a book or two to the children, set up whatever activity they want - craft or science or whatever - and still have time for a cup of tea and a sit-down before lunch at noon.

Clearing up after lunch should be done by 1pm.

This leaves the afternoon for more housework and laundry, gardening, visiting or being visited, outings, more activities, and another cup of tea and a sit down before dinner at about 6:30pm.

Clearing up after dinner should be done by 7:30pm so we can get the children to bed. That means that from 8:30 or 9pm I should be free to blog, paint, et cetera.

THIS IS NOT REAL. Why do I have this schedule in my head? This is not what my life is like.

Comments

[the-changeling.livejournal.com]

My bio Mum was immaculate, in all senses, as she hadn't given birth to me, in her version of events. OCD on housework, appearance and general social interaction and conformity.

No real friends, husband who always felt excluded as she was off saving the family from disasters and makign everyone knew she was theone doing the sacrificing.

Her biggest attack zone was my shape, and food. I was put on my first diet at 9 years old, and she spent years berating me for not having the self-control to lose weight.

As opposed to her always giving up cigarettes. Strangely, she gave them up a lot, and is still a chain smoker in her 70s.

I once said she didn't understand how hard it ws not to eat, and she smoked! She said smoking was a drug, and food wasn't. It was years before it occurred to me that no matter what, you HAVE to eat. And you don't have to smoke.

Also, one of her most stunning illogics, is that smoking did not affect her appearance. people could see I was fat. But her smoking made no difference to her general appearance and standards of turned out-ness. Yes, this is a woman who genuinely believes she does not smell of cigarette smoke, as she is a clean and tidy person who washes and changes clothes every day. Those 40 fags a day just never touch her hair, skin of clothing.

Clearly, logic and rational thinking not high on the agenda... and her house is still perfect, and her garden still immaculate. And she still has no friends, no comfort, and no down time. Just stays up all night, smoking, as she can't sleep.

Which is my fault, clearly. ;-)

[sashajwolf.livejournal.com]

I hear you. My mother put me on a diet at 9 as well, and here I am, still de-programming myself in my 40s.