A star unborn...

Principles... or fame?

Conversation with glitz at 2005-04-07 21:18:11 on Ailbhe (aim)

Ailbhe: Linnea is destined for international seedy TV fame!
glitz: Good lord!
glitz: Has she become a lady priest?
glitz: Is she an ultramarathoner?
Ailbhe: Footballers Wives Television series want to use her ultrasound image
glitz: good lord! NEKKID LINNEA ON TRASH TELLY!
Ailbhe: Yes
Ailbhe: the idea of allowing her to be used like that is appalling but Iwish I could find out if they're willing ot pay us money
Ailbhe: they say "It could be anice story totell her when she's older"
glitz: it is true.
glitz: it will be.
glitz: and you shouldn't do it without the money.
Ailbhe: I think I might never, ever tell her
glitz: bwa haa!
Ailbhe: "There was a TV program that we never watched but was in a lot of very bad magazines, and you were in it, sort of, but we never saw it, and that's why we can afford a jacuzzi."
glitz: she will never be able to sell her story to Heat! now!
Ailbhe: It... lacks that blurry, sentimental, reminiscing feeling.
glitz: what, the photo?
Ailbhe: No, the television series
glitz: and, nonsense. by the time she is 18, people's personal memories will be entirely colonised by celebrity culture and Big Brother.
Ailbhe: Heh
Ailbhe: "Oh my, like, god, she was like on realityvision before, like, she was even born, you know, like?"
Ailbhe: There should be a whatever in there somewhere
glitz: yes! she, like, is preprogrammed for FAME and CRAP COVER SONGS.
glitz: dude.
Ailbhe: We could do it to celebrate her first birthday
glitz: a cover song?
glitz: omg! you could mock up a cover of Heat! with the ultrasound as the cover pic!
Ailbhe: "In memory of your first birthday, here is the video of you being used to pose as a bleach-blonde plastic-surgeon's-model married to a thug with no neck's baby.
glitz: and a fake interview and MAKEOVER SUIT
Ailbhe: *laugh*
Ailbhe: I may have to post this conversation to LJ
glitz: hee! go ahead!
Ailbhe: I will post it. Edited a bit probably.
glitz: *tremble*
glitz: ok!
glitz: make me funnier!

Mildly traumatic day

I started running errands at about 14:30 and managed to achieve baby food, baby medicines, "eco-friendly" nappies, foodstuffs, a pair of trousers that had to be tried on in a fitting room with an open door because there wasn't enough space for the buggy and Linnea screamed when I closed the door - I hope the shop floor appreciates baby belly and cellulite - and Linnea's first pair of Real Shoes From A Shop.

I had already tried Clarks, and failed to feel satisfied that the person I dealt with knew one end of a foot from the other. I found a Start-Rite shop with trained staff, which was great, but they only had little girls' shoes in pink, or little boys' shoes in blue with Extra Tough Webbing or Super Camo Laces or Army Trim or similar. So I tried John Lewis. Her shoe size is 4.5 G, but sandals don't come in half sizes or G width, so she has size 5 F. That's ok, because sandals can be adjusted for width at the front and back independently, which she needs, because in ordinary shoes, I can get my thumb in beside her heel when the front fits the ball of her foot perfectly. Two people with extra-wide toes and narrow heels should not breed. The poor kid looks fine, but needs duck shoes.

She was really very well-behaved, considering, and I'd like you to consider a feisty, underslept toddler being made to sit still and have her feet measured three times in one day, and try on lots of shoes. Considering? Good.

So we set off for home and the skies opened, yea, and there was a crashing of rain and a lashing of hail and I was blinded and soaked while the baby slept on in her plastic bubble and my fingers went red-raw on the buggy-handle and I was gradually made to realise that the surgery wasn't as great as all that because when sufficiently cold and wet, I'm not as continent as I thought I was. Oh well; I was wet enough that no-one could tell...

Then I came home and someone on The Archers was having a baby and as soon as she said "Oh my god it's started!" I started to cry. Clearly, I am not as over this as I thought I was. (And why do people in soaps always say "Oh my god it's started?" or "It's time," or "The baby! they baby is coming!" then? Everyone in my antenatal group started off saying "Um, I think it might be..." or "This could be it..." or something similarly indefinite).