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ailbheEmer's asleep so I can switch my other brain on.
Non-judgmental play supervision: How do you go about allowing your children to choose their forms of independent play when you know that they are acting out violent, gender-stereotyped, or other undesirable roles? I don't have time to go into much detail now but am thinking of stuff like Barbie, guns, etc. Some toys give me the screaming abdabs but I also feel I ought to allow them to play with them, so I try to keep out of it and let it go on around me without voicing a judgment, but there again, I'm fairly sure they're not dim enough not to realise when I'm judging my little heart out.
Property: My kids have SO MUCH STUFF and one of the ways Linnea expresses naughtiness is to destroy her own stuff. In general I either confiscate it and mend it or confiscate it and bin it. I do not replace destroyed stuff. There's too much already. What Would LJ Do?
Consequences: Linnea ate the icing off the defrosted cake in a box on the counter this morning. The cake itself is fine, though probably not fit to be given to guests, but I think she has forfeited her right to eat any of it now. Am I a tyrant or is that a reasonable, connected to the event, direct, comprehensible consequence?
Laundry: Do you think small spatters of orange turmeric staining on the front fly area of a pair of brand new beige trousers would be better or worse than small spatters of white marks where I failed to bleach it properly? I need to make this decision soon. I suppose I can always dye them brown...
Non-judgmental play supervision: How do you go about allowing your children to choose their forms of independent play when you know that they are acting out violent, gender-stereotyped, or other undesirable roles? I don't have time to go into much detail now but am thinking of stuff like Barbie, guns, etc. Some toys give me the screaming abdabs but I also feel I ought to allow them to play with them, so I try to keep out of it and let it go on around me without voicing a judgment, but there again, I'm fairly sure they're not dim enough not to realise when I'm judging my little heart out.
Property: My kids have SO MUCH STUFF and one of the ways Linnea expresses naughtiness is to destroy her own stuff. In general I either confiscate it and mend it or confiscate it and bin it. I do not replace destroyed stuff. There's too much already. What Would LJ Do?
Consequences: Linnea ate the icing off the defrosted cake in a box on the counter this morning. The cake itself is fine, though probably not fit to be given to guests, but I think she has forfeited her right to eat any of it now. Am I a tyrant or is that a reasonable, connected to the event, direct, comprehensible consequence?
Laundry: Do you think small spatters of orange turmeric staining on the front fly area of a pair of brand new beige trousers would be better or worse than small spatters of white marks where I failed to bleach it properly? I need to make this decision soon. I suppose I can always dye them brown...
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Date: 2008-05-29 02:08 pm (UTC)Gender: I only say something if Jack says "girls/boys can't... or only girls/boys can...". I can't see what he plays at as being gender-stereotyped unless he does, and since he plays a variety of roles again I'm not too worried. I have noticed that he's not really aware of the nurses and doctors distinction. He knows nurses exist but as far as he's concerned all his medical care has been done by doctors even when I've introduced him to the nurses - in his mind 'nurse' is just another word for 'doctor'.
Property: If it's broken on purpose, it's gone. If he is sorry, I'll try to mend it, but no guarantees.
Consequences: You are not a tyrant. She is old enough now. I think Jack was around the same age when he went and ate some chocolates that were on the dining table after I'd taken them away from him in the living room. I had told him he could have some more after tea, he couldn't wait. So when I realised what he'd done I removed them again and told him he wouldn't get any later. He hasn't done it since.
Laundry: is there anything else you can use?
http://indianfood.about.com/od/quicktips/qt/turmericstain.htm
http://www.newscientist.com/backpage.ns?id=mg18224506.900
May help!