Pampering

[ailbhe]

What does the word mean to you? To me, it implies pleasure.

Not, say, ritual humiliation, which is my main experience of "beauty treatments."

A hot bath and a big chocolate cake and a really good Wodehouse or Heyer - that's pampering myself. Having to pick tickly bits of hair out of my jumper for days, or spending two books-worth of money on nailpolish applied by someone who can't believe I don't push my cuticles back? Not pampering.

Comments

[clare-s.livejournal.com]

A form of pleasure which means indulging in something which makes me feel good and is just for myself.

[surelars.livejournal.com]

Yes, that.

A stretch of time where I can put my feet up and get lost in a good book, or listen to opera. Or getting up early, getting out my bike to go for a long, hard ride, letting the body work hard and leaving everything behind.

[kcobweb.livejournal.com]

I have sometimes used the term "pampering" when I do my own nails or something like that. But it's usually something I'm doing for myself, not something someone else does *to* me.

[biascut.livejournal.com]

I do love getting my hair cut, but yes, all the other stuff that gets marketed as "pampering" and "treating yourself" tends to make me awkward. I do remember once having a facial, and there was a bit where the woman was doing "extractions", and I just thought, "I'm paying someone to squeeze my blackheads. Something's gone really, really wrong with global capitalism."

The one that really stuns me is the idea of getting a bikini wax as "pampering"!

[ailbhe]

I had a facial once - clanwilliam and I went to a spa near Paddington for a women's only day, before my wedding, and we had a wonderful time which I have often wanted to repeat - and it was lovely. But the spot-squeezing was gross and if I'd had more confidence I'd have asked her not to do it.

The facial massage part was lovely.

(Actually, now there's less of it, haircuts aren't so awful, but when it was long, hairdressers were so incredibly fucking clueless that I generally ended up in tears).

[(Anonymous)]

In my experience, (about 40 years of long hair) hairdressers are fucking clueless about long hair because they are trained to CUT hair, and therefore their impulse is, "Hair! Cut it off!" Then a long hair person comes in and says, "I just want a trim, please" and they go "Huh????? Hair! Cut it off!"

I agree it's much less stress getting a haircut when your hair is short! (Except when you're married to a long-hair-loving person, who, every time you get so much as a trim, goes, "Hmmph! Too short!" But that's a different issue ;-) )

Elaine xx

[perdita-x.livejournal.com]

Pampering for me is something that makes me feel better, so anything from a day out having fun to laying in the sun with a book (not sunbathing, just enjoying the heat) to going to the art gallery and not have to take notes (something I did today).

Although sometimes I do buy into plucking my eyebrows and I do occasionally wear make-up, these both get included as pampering (don't paint my nails - they break/chip too easily). For me, hair removal (though almost always shaved) is down to hating body hair, rather than because its feminine.

[barakta]

I think the assumption of what is and isn't pampering is half the issue. Some people like some things, others don't. My ex-German teacher used to get her nails done every Friday night, she wasn't especially 'makeuppy' but it was something she liked to do after a long week at work.

I also like the long hot bath, good books and chocolate (cake too)! I also take my hearing aid out for the best part of the day as a form of pampering. The quiet is nice!

[junipertree.livejournal.com]

I find pedicures pampering, manicures less so.

Facials pampering, but no "extractions" or bright lights please.

Massages...mmmmmm.

[nitoda]

At your stage of life I would have considered myself pampered if someone had offered childcare for the day and allowed me to spend time with others of my choosing doing things just for me. "Beauty" treatments are not pampering, they are torture. ;-)

[random-c.livejournal.com]

I break manicurists. I don't have any cuticles. This is usually because if I allow any hint of the damn things, they dry up, split, and bleed. I have therefore perfected various techniques of completely removing them. This confuses them as they seem to think it's practical to use hand cream every 15 minutes or something.
Anyway, pampering is indulgence. Beer, bath, book sort of thing. Maybe Duvet.

[micheinnz.livejournal.com]

"Pampering" means "fussy and ultimately unnecessary" to me. Not one iota of pleasure about it. And "pampered" means "spoiled".

What you described? Torture.

[tiggsybabes.livejournal.com]

Pampering to me is a bit of peace & quiet & the choice to decide what I want to do.

I pampered myself yesterday as I was home alone for an hour, but fancied some company, so went over to my friend's house who has 6 children. 4 were around (aged 4 weeks, 2 years, 7 years & 12 years) but as they weren't mine, I just relaxed & played & had fun & drank tea & chatted & cuddled the cute little baby :)

Even though the 2 year old was being 2 in a big way, it flowed over me as he wasn't mine.

[cangetmad.livejournal.com]

To be honest, I associate "pampering" solely with the "painful ways to make yourself socially acceptable" thing, so I don't have any positive associations. I like having my hair cut because my hairdresser is great to chat to, and I like the way my hair looks after a cut. But that's therefore not "pampering".

[talimena.livejournal.com]

Pleasure, yes, and being taken care of/taking care of myself. So a bath and book might not feel like pampering to me, but if I think, Hey, you need a nice warm bath and a soothing book, then it does. If that makes any sense. And I love, love, love getting my hair washed. I get my hair cut once a year, at most, but if I had tons of money I'd get it washed in a salon much more often.

[supermouse.livejournal.com]

For me, it's having Pol rub my feet, or what I do for myself when I settle down with a really nice meal I cooked perhaps days ago. Or a freshly made bed with the cover on. Occasionally it's a cold day, a warm fire, a duvet, warm socks and a cuppa. And a book, radio or television. I love television, it's very pampering when you're not up to much.

It has positive connotations, with a sort of implied warning that it's meant to be occasional, and you'll get too soft if you have too much of it.

I know some women really do feel pampered when they go for spa and beauty treatments. I've had a facial that genuinely left me feeling pampered, too. On the other hand, generally speaking I spend the money on extra-nice food instead.

[pocketnaomi.livejournal.com]

I like spa days, but I agree about "beauty treatments" and tend to go for the massages and hot tub experience.

[libellum.livejournal.com]

Not something I'm good enough at doing to myself. I occasionally manage time spent reading, cuddling the kitten, or having a long bath ... but less so since moving into a house I'm not really comfortable. These days most of my pampering is something I get from partners and lovers. Massages, being cooked for, tender, sensual play sessions focussed on me (I'm a sub, so it doesn't happen often - usually when the focus is on me it's fairly hard work. Which is rewarding and hot, but not exactle pampering!). I need to re-learn how to pamper myself - it's the most important kind.

[zinecure.livejournal.com]

Pampering.....someone watching my kid, a hot bubble bath, a glass of red wine and a good romance novel....and two hours to enjoy it all...that is pampering. However, my husband sent me to a deep tissue massage and that was pure heaven;)

[the0lady.livejournal.com]

The beauty industry in the UK is DREADFUL. I totally agree with your assessment of what passes for "pampering" here. And the cost is frankly unbelievable. Paying some teenager £25 to break all my nails by filing them badly and then smudge and bungle the polish is definitely not my idea of fun, either.

For me pampering is having someone else do to me something that I can't do for myself. So facials, massages, haircuts etc. all qualify. Goes without saying that I only feel pampered if they do it *well*.

Stuff I do for myself (baths, home facials etc.) comes under different categories of "looking after myself" and/or "pleasurable passties", but it's not strictly speaking "pampering".