Is it a boy? Is it a girl? No, it's Linnea!

[ailbhe]

While I was in Dublin, radegund and I brought her son and my daughter to a playground one afternoon. They played on the swings and slide and so on, and then O's ball was spotted by some of the other kids, and various people used it for various games. After a while, one boy of about 9 and two of about 5 ish I think were playing a form of football with it, and O was watching from the sidelines with interest and some anxiety (he's very attached to his football, and needs to make sure it's safe at all times), and Linnea was joining in.

She ran after the oldest boy, and he kicked the ball over her to the younger ones, and she picked it up and kicked it, and so on. He addressed has as "Buddy" at this point, and played quite hard with her, with lots of teasing (I almost but not quite felt a need to actually intervene - at one point, he was holding the ball out on the ground, telling her to kick it, and then whisking it away yelling "Too slow!" - but he managed to stay just the right side of upsetting her.

He must have heard me saying good girl, because suddenly he asked "What's the girl's name?" and we told him. After that, he kicked the ball gently to her, yelled at the 5-year-olds not to kick the ball too hard at the little girl, stopped teasing her completely, and praised every single kick she did. She had just as much fun with the new way of playing, because although it was less exciting, she did get more actual ball-time.

He knew, at his early age, that boys need to be toughened up with plenty of mean, rough play, and girls need to be treated gently and kindly.

I was amazed by how sudden and complete the change in his behaviour was. I was also wondering why he took on the role of Responsible Adult for all the kids in the playground, whether or not they had arrived with him, but that wasn't relevant to the sex differences issue.

Comments

[rmc28]

I'm an oldest sibling and tend to take the responsible role even now.