Walking away is not news
Sep. 29th, 2009 06:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ailbheIt's not even surprising. What's surprising is when people don't walk away.
I took Linnea out of her dance class early today because she was being disruptive, which isn't fair on the other children, especially the one supposedly partnering her. On the way home, she ran away a few times, and around a corner out of sight twice. The first time I put her in the buggy for a bit, the second, I sat down with her, next to a building.
We sat there until she was ready to walk home properly again.
Chasing her is miserable. It's difficult, and stressful, and sometimes frightening - when she's wild, how do I know her usual good sense will kick in in time to stop her actual running off the kerb? - and holding her hand tight enough to stop her running off feels like it might be crushing something and holding her lower or upper arm tight enough to stop her running off leaves a reddish mark for a while. I don't think it's bruised her.
So I refused to do it, and we just sat. Luckily I had seven shiny conkers for Emer to play with, so she was quite happy. I didn't give Linnea anything to play with. I refused to stand up and look in my backpack for her cardigan, either.
Eventually her need for the toilet forced her to agree to walk without brute force coercion.
It was miserable. A thirty-minute amble took an hour and a quarter. I'm miserable.
But when we got home I talked to her, and apologised for losing my temper, and she apologised for running away and showing people her pants (not something which I was asking her to apologise for, though I did say that if she didn't want to wear her dress I would take it off and she could go home in just pants; I did lose my temper!) and then I said that if she wanted to go to school she could go but if she didn't she had to make it possible for me to look after her and keep her alive every single day. So she agreed to be good tomorrow and also showed me that she can multiply and add up and write her name without a prompt.
I took Linnea out of her dance class early today because she was being disruptive, which isn't fair on the other children, especially the one supposedly partnering her. On the way home, she ran away a few times, and around a corner out of sight twice. The first time I put her in the buggy for a bit, the second, I sat down with her, next to a building.
We sat there until she was ready to walk home properly again.
Chasing her is miserable. It's difficult, and stressful, and sometimes frightening - when she's wild, how do I know her usual good sense will kick in in time to stop her actual running off the kerb? - and holding her hand tight enough to stop her running off feels like it might be crushing something and holding her lower or upper arm tight enough to stop her running off leaves a reddish mark for a while. I don't think it's bruised her.
So I refused to do it, and we just sat. Luckily I had seven shiny conkers for Emer to play with, so she was quite happy. I didn't give Linnea anything to play with. I refused to stand up and look in my backpack for her cardigan, either.
Eventually her need for the toilet forced her to agree to walk without brute force coercion.
It was miserable. A thirty-minute amble took an hour and a quarter. I'm miserable.
But when we got home I talked to her, and apologised for losing my temper, and she apologised for running away and showing people her pants (not something which I was asking her to apologise for, though I did say that if she didn't want to wear her dress I would take it off and she could go home in just pants; I did lose my temper!) and then I said that if she wanted to go to school she could go but if she didn't she had to make it possible for me to look after her and keep her alive every single day. So she agreed to be good tomorrow and also showed me that she can multiply and add up and write her name without a prompt.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-09-29 06:10 pm (UTC)I did spend a lot of the walk home wishing I could just slap her in the face, though. That was... about as much fun as it sounds like.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-09-29 07:03 pm (UTC)You are such a involved, self-aware parent. I wish I'd been as good with Hux when he was little as you are with your girls. You are brilliant.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-09-29 09:23 pm (UTC)