The Holiday: Centreparcs Longleat

We headed off on the train on Friday evening (20th April) and had a totally uneventful journey. The waiting room at Basingstoke station was lovely; clean, warm, neutrally decorated, chairs, information desk, cafe, etc. No idea how long that's been there but we were very impressed. I expect waiting rooms to smell of wee and cigarettes, and ot have chewing gum all over the seats.

The taxi with child carseat was waiting for us, and we got to the villa without any problems. On arrival we put the kids to bed and I nested like mad; a hangover from my days of moving every few months is that I move into a new place very very quickly and make it mine.

Next day we started by going to hire bikes. We got a child seat for mine and a trailer for Rob's, because Emer isn't old enough to go in an upright child seat yet. Turns out that on a sufficiently small frame I can cycle comfortably, though obviously I am so unfit it's almost funny. By the end of the week I was able to cycle a couple of miles with Linnea in the seat on the back fairly easily.

We spent a lot of time in the pool; they had floaty vests for Linnea to borrow and we bought Emer a sit-in ring thing. There was a problem with the boiler so the pool wasn't as warm as we'd have liked but we were able to warm the babies up in the hot whirlpools from time to time. Rob and Linnea did a lot of sliding; I went down the flume once with Linnea and down a faster slide once alone. I am so chicken. The outdoor heated pool was our favourite part, without question. Next best thing to swimming in the real sea at the end of August.

In the mornings we watched squirrels and ducks outside our patio door. One morning we had ducks coming right up to the glass, begging for bread. Rob and Emer saw deer one morning - or possibly night, since although it was after dawn Rob was only awake because Emer was. I was sound asleep.

There was a trip on a pedalo, and Linnea painted a mug for Farmor, and I painted a teapot for the house, and Linnea spent a few hours in the childcare club place, and we ate out and cooked barbecues at the villa. Linnea isn't totally clear on the concept of raw food, though she's beginning to grasp the principles.

Rob cycled to the local Morrisons to buy rice milk because there was none in the onsite supermarket, a possibility I hadn't entertained because even Powells on Aran has ricemilk nowadays.

The train trip home (Friday 27th) was a little more eventful because we were knackered and going home is never as much fun as going away, but at least we had done almost all the laundry at the laundrette so we were bringing clean things home. When we got here we started preparing for the party on Sunday, so there wasn't much resting.

The Birthday: Linnea is Three

Linnea's party went well. We bought lots of food, paper plates and bowls, etc. We did most of the food purchasing on Friday and most of the prep on Saturday. Then on Sunday we sliced the wet vegetables and bought the bread. There was some sort of major train disruption so no-one from London or environs could come but we had a lot of folks anyway. There were Radz and Niall and Oyster (3), Nicky and Luke and Iz and Jo (4), Helen and Brian and Dylan and Rose (4), five of the Porticos (5), Mary from Homestart (1), Farmor and Grandad (2) (my mother has never yet been around for Linnea's birthday, but hopefully that will change one of these years...), Ruth and Ben from our street (2), James-who-is-not-red (1), Linda and Emily from our street (2), and I think that's it. That's 24 people not including the four of us. I've probably forgotten someone.

The cake was fantastic. Sam delivered it (she lives around the corner and sells cakes at the Farmer's Market and the Workhouse Coffee Shop) on Sunday morning and I couldn't believe how gorgeous it was. It cost almost exactly what I'd budgeted for it a couple of months ago, too. It was two round tiers, decorated with carrots and a bunny who had carelessly left footprints all over the icing. Because not everyone came we only needed the bottom tier and all the kids got a carrot.

There were no organised games at the party. We had a paddling pool full of balls, about 30 tubs of playdough, paper, crayons, a rocking horse, a sit-on train, a Vtech walker, and so on. And a couple of tables with picnic food on them. Oddly, almost no-one ate fruit, so I foisted a lot of it onto James when he was leaving. A number of people were able to take baguettes away with them too. But I managed to find a working kettle and teacups, so we had tea at least.

It was very very low-key. I shall seriously consider using that hall again and doing almost exactly the same thing for other parties; it was easy and pleasant, and now that I've been there once I know what I need to do differently in future. I doubt there'll ever be another cake like that one though; this was the very first celebration of Linnea's birth, but it's a bit extravagant for every year.

I do love my girl.

The Houseguests: Toddlerific

Sunday: House was a bombsite. Oyster and Linnea hit it off beautifully. We ate party leftovers and pizza for dinner.

Monday: Niall had to leave in the afternoon so we stayed close to home; we took them all to the playground after a morning in the house. We came back for lunch in time to let the cleaner in and ask her to clean the jelly off the shelves in the fridge. And that night I cut all my hair off and Radz finished it off with the clippers.

Tuesday: I spent the morning at the library having my breastfeeding supporter lesson. Radz and I took all three kids to the local lagoon pool in the afternoon, which has a gradual slope in so toddlers can find their own depth, and Linnea taught herself to swim. I left her in the shallow end without any float aids, so she couldn't get into deep water, and stood with Emer in the baby pool. Then I turned around to see Linnea swimming out of her depth, grinning widely. So I had to go and get her armbands from the pool attendant. But I am, as always, earthshakingly proud of her new skill, even though, like crawling, walking, running, climbing, and playing the tin-whistle, it makes my job more difficult (tin-whistle is a particularly dangerous skill in the hands of an energetic toddler without respiratory issues). Then we went home via Mothercare and TGI Fridays (urgh) and the True Food Co-op. The Oyster had a ride in the trike, which he enjoyed for a limited period only.

Wednesday: We hung around the house in the morning in case anyone showed up for NCT coffee (no-one did, thankfully) and went to the cafe for the book thing in the afternoon. I don't think anyone is enjoying Cold Comfort Farm much; it's a book one really has to be in the right mood for.

Thursday: We went shopping in the morning and Radz got a few bits and pieces in H&M. I started looking on my own but rapidly became suffused with irritation so went to admire Radz in the changing rooms instead, and she cleverly encouraged me to buy a top when she got out. In the afternoon we went to Alison's and then I went to my therapy appointment, amid much taxi messing about, and we did a little more background and then I went back to Alison's. Eventually we tore ourselves away and came home.

Friday: We went to London and met Radz's second cousin and her son, and a friend of Radz's from school, and Kim, and we played in the park and had a picnic and then it was incredibly late and we had to eat in Burger King which was even worse than McDonalds and only had Coke-brand orange juice. Worse, Linnea fell asleep before her food arrived and didn't wake up until we were on the train home, miles away from food. And everyone needed clean nappies - Linnea's was full of sand from the sandpit and she was rubbed red by it - and it was all very hard work. But apart from travel trouble it was a great day. Radz and I stupidly sat up until 3 am talking about, er, mainly abusive parents, really. And how not to be one.

Saturday: We all went swimming in the morning - three adults and three kids is a good ratio - and afterwards we had chips. We ate a lot of really bad food this week. Then Radz and Oyster headed off to Luton and we hung around at home for the rest of the day. I had horrendous indigestion from mixing drinks (white wine and coffee; just say no) and ended up eating porridge for dinner. In the evening we moved the swing in the back garden and cleared away some rubble; I messed about with finances and checked a few things in the Argos catalogue; I had a late-night bath and went to bed before midnight.

At some point I decided that a week is a bad period for toddlers to visit each other - they need either a much longer time or a much shorter time.

The stressful phonecall

Booking our return trip to Centreparcs on the courtesy phone was one of the worst customer services phone experiences of my life, beaten only by being shouted at by the LPI tester in Wapping in 2000.

I've never had anyone actually make that eye-rolling high-pitched "oooh" noise before.

Eventually she hung up on me.

Luckily the information desk people sorted it all out for us, when I went to them shaking with rage.

I was very proud of myself for demanding better service.

It's still going on.

Irish teenager denied right to travel for an abortion.

Recent roadside rescues

In recent weeks we have found, abandoned by the side of the road, a bike, a seesaw-cum-roundabout, and a scooter. The scooter doesn't work but the others do.

The seesaw is set up in the garden even now; it needed no attention.

The bike is a pink Barbie one, with slight damage to the saddle. It basically needs oiling and the height of the saddle needs to be adjusted; then we need to work out how to obliterate the most offensive parts of the pink Barbie ness of it. Then Linnea can cycle it, possibly with stabilisers. But cycling is hard.

BfN: Breastfeeding support lessons

On Tuesday mornings I attend a course in the local library, run by The Breastfeeding Network, which will eventually qualify me to give advice and assistance to women who want to breastfeed their children.

Of course, the downside of this is that my personal opinions will have to slide to the background, because I'll have to rely on official scientific information, but I think I'm already ok at telling people when I have no source for my information, so that might not be too hard.

The first lesson was good, though hectic, because there are eleven women there with children in the creche in the same room, which isn't the most peaceful learning environment - but since advice-giving will often be done in a room with one or more crying babies, that's not a bad precedent either. (None of the children in the creche were crying, but noise is noise, up to a point).

Local election

Turnout: 28%.

Wow.

Things to do

Done:
Moved the swing so there's more space in the garden (mainly Rob).

Cleared out and repacked understairs cupboards - first the bag one, then the everything else one. We've sorted out the playdough and cutters into one box, the paper in another, paint in a bag, sticking and gluing things in a drawer, spare pencils, crayons, etc... we have tons of art gear and no need for more for about a zillion years. Also sorted out the medicines.

Sorted the dresser in the dining room so there's somewhere to keep the laptops.

Yet to do:
Sort the paperwork on top of the damn dresser.
Buy rotary clothesline (whirligig).
Take trike for maintenance.
Plant grass.
Plant potatoes in a pot. We have sprouting potatoes, we have an empty pot, it's obvious.
Sort dining room so there's somewhere to keep the laptops.

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Things Linnea said today:
Potatoes go with mayonnaise, you know.

Grass goes with sunshine.

Trees go with sunshine too.

Also: she started to wee on the floor, stopped herself, went to the toilet, and finished there.