... and another thing:

[ailbhe]

From http://www.whitehouse.gov/contact/ :

"please do not send consumable gifts -- such as food, flowers, and other perishable items -- to the White House. While President Obama, the First Lady, Vice President Biden, and Dr. Biden appreciate your thoughtfulness, they request that instead you look to your local community"

D'y'see that?! D'y'see that?! There are feminists in the White House!

Comments

[kiya]

... sweet.

[ex-serenejo.livejournal.com]

Too. Fucking. Awesome.

[pocketnaomi.livejournal.com]

Now if we can only get rid of that ridiculous archaic term "First Lady." Better yet, get rid of the role, and let the president's spouse keep their own job for a change.

[pocketnaomi.livejournal.com]

IIRC, she ran the legal staff of the U of C Hospital system most recently. I'd like to see her be able to get hired doing the same thing for one of the major DC systems; heaven knows some of them need it. However, I'd settle for her being able to continue putting her attention primarily into her kids (their father will do his best, but he hasn't got a 9-5 job for the next few years) rather than being expected to be the social queen of the US and chat up ambassadors over dinner and give the fashion columnists something to talk about.

Not that chatting up ambassadors over dinner isn't a skilled job -- ask any career diplomat. But I don't see why it should automatically become the responsibility of anyone who happens to be married to the president.

[thereyougothen.livejournal.com]

it becomes the job of anyone married to any person appointed ambassador as well, doesn't it?

i don't think it's a job you can do if your partner isn't willing and able to take a career break and take on a job with no pay.

and Jill Biden has only been Dr Biden for 2 years - she managed to earn a PhD while her husband was running for high office. She's pretty incredible, going by that evidence.

[buzzy-bee.livejournal.com]

If she got a job in DC, that would just be another can of worms. With unemployment what it is, can't you just see the headlines now, about some highly qualified mother of 4 who lost their job to make one for Michelle Obama, or who just lost out on getting the job, for her? True or not, it would be really bad PR.

In the late 80s or early 90s, I forget which, the current Chief Justice of New Zealand, Dame Sian Elias faced exactly that criticism - her husband was at the time head of one of the country's biggest companies. I remember commenting that very few people in the dole queue would be qualified to do her job (she was a QC at the time).

[biascut.livejournal.com]

it becomes the job of anyone married to any person appointed ambassador as well, doesn't it?

And only three weeks ago I was talking to a friend in the foreign office who was saying that it doesn't matter how supportive your boss and your staff are, it's nearly impossible to be a female diplomat because the culture is so set up for Men With Wives.

[hfnuala.livejournal.com]

A diplomat I know (and am not related to) told me that when posted to London they'd get regular requests for 'a wife' to send to events. Because they aren't likely to be busy.

[thereyougothen.livejournal.com]

well, i'm a feminist, and I'm not angered by it. i think my kids are my #1 priority too. so probably do most parents who work 60 hour weeks outside the home. they probably think doing that makes a better life for their kids.

i'm lucky that my job is looking after my kids these days. maybe my kids are lucky too, but I imagine that Michelle Obama will be working more than 37.5 hours a week, in her new volunteer position. and her daughters will find their time with her isn't as much as they want.

[cat63.livejournal.com]

She has already angered some feminists herself, by saying she's the "First Mommy" as that's what she considers to be her #1 priority.

I don't see why that should anger feminists - isn't the point having the choice as to what your priorities are?

[rmc28]

But some feminists don't like women making the 'wrong' choice and betraying the sisterhood.

(I agree with you, not them, btw).

[cat63.livejournal.com]

But some feminists don't like women making the 'wrong' choice and betraying the sisterhood.

Ah. I can sort of see where that's coming from, but it seems to me as if they've rather missed the point.

[cangetmad.livejournal.com]

That's a bit of a scare quotes thing, too - which feminists, and where did they say this? I'd definitely think of myself as a mother before a lady of any kind.

[baratron.livejournal.com]

To be fair, when I was younger I was absolutely appalled by the thought of any woman being a stay at home mother. I thought that feminism was all about having the best career possible and fitting in a couple of kids if you could be bothered. It took ailbhe for me to realise that choosing to be a SAH parent was a feminist choice as well.

I think where this came from was the fact that I've never wanted children for myself, so I assumed that all women were the same way really. You know, the "I think X therefore people in general must also think X" fallacy? I thought that women had children because it was expected, not that it could be something they might want for themselves. I suspect a lot of the "feminists" who are against the idea of stay at home parenting are also childfree and haven't yet realised that they are the unusual ones.

[ailbhe]

There are also those women who want children the way most men want children - they do want children, very much, but they don't want to make unpaid childcare their career.

[cat63.livejournal.com]

You know, the "I think X therefore people in general must also think X" fallacy?

Oh yes. It's so hard not to fall prey to that one isn't it? I try to remind myself often (especially on the internet) of how different people's ideas and experiences can be from mine, but I don't always succeed.

[(Anonymous)]

I think Ailbhe is the one person who really cured me of the guilt 'Society' has always made me feel for making the choice to be a SAHM. (Even though I did some part-time paid employment in the pre-school my children attended during the years they were there - which was over a long period, as I have 5 sons!) I still hate the way people ask mothers "Do you work?" I always used to answer, "Yes, but not in paid employment."

However, I get less than half the minimum state pension now as a result. To me the biggest boost for SAHM's has been the new rule which gives Nation Insurance Credits for the years spent raising your own children!

Hurray for REAL freedom of choice, and for valuing the work SAHM's do!

Elaine