Heaven protect us from the convalescent child

[ailbhe]

It isn't very meek and it isn't very mild
In fact it's quite sadistic - let's leave it in the wild
Heaven can't protect us from the convalescent child.

Today's question: How does one prepare for a sleepless week followed by at least two days on which one is screamed at - followed around the house and screamed at - for 45 minutes without pause? Provide examples and show your work.

Comments

[tiggsybabes.livejournal.com]

I cope by muttering "piss off" "bog off" etc under my breath & tuning out. Holly can keep it up for about 2 hours as well.

[jexia]

Step 1) Buy a plane ticket to a far-away place.

Step 2) Lock the children in the kitchen with a bowl of pudding to entertain themselves while you pack.

Step 3) Flee.

[pogodragon.livejournal.com]

Soundproofing and good locks?

There are reasons I decided long ago that I'd make a really REALLY lousy parent.

[iuil.livejournal.com]

Screaming back "would you ever just f***ing shut up for 5 minutes" doesn't really work and will only make you feel worse.

Not that I know from personal experience or anything ...

[naath.livejournal.com]

Highly caffeinated beverages to help with the staying awake with no sleep and earplugs to help with the screaming.

[browngirl.livejournal.com]

How does one prepare for a sleepless week followed by at least two days on which one is screamed at - followed around the house and screamed at - for 45 minutes without pause?

I do not know. But you have my sympathy and empathy.

[nitoda]

The usual method is nine months long and involves varying degrees of nausea, swelling, discomfort and weight gain followed by a dramatic and painful event after which some of the weight is lost ... ;-)