Volunteer: Doing and using

[ailbhe]

I regularly use a couple of excellent volunteer, charity services, and I give my time and energy to a few, too. The ones I use are Homestart (Mary who comes to visit, goes to the park with us, drinks tea, etc) and the Breastfeeding Network, who are training me as a supporter for free.

I also give my time to the Breastfeeding Network, and to the True Food Co-op (though that's for perks, not just for free). There are others - the NCT, on and off, and the book club, and various other mother-and-baby things, but those are the two fairly regular ones. I'm glad I've gone over to being a real True Food volunteer; I've been doing tiny bits on and off since before Rob and I got married, but now it's real.

Sometimes I feel that I'm not entitled to the help I get from Mary. It's mainly pussikerlogical help, and I am very grateful for it, but part of me feels terribly guilty for not freeing her up to visit someone who really needs it.

Sometimes I feel guilty for not doing more - most recently, for not even considering going to Faslane - because I have such a safe, comfortable life, and I could, really.

Then I remember how ill I was. A recent weekend away made me seriously weak for well over 24 hours after it was over, because it involved a last-minute change of plans (very high stress for me) and late-evening travelling (very tiring). Missing a day's exercise makes me feeble and depressed. Phone calls sometimes paralyse me.

I need to do less, not more, and to work on allowing myself to feel ok with that.

Comments

[cangetmad.livejournal.com]

Ditto, ditto - especially wondering why I'm taking up a Homestart volunteer's time. And I'm trying to get volunteering stuff sorted out for myself, and then I wonder why, if I'm okay enough to organise demos, I'm not okay enough to get the kids to a playgroup without help and ugh. And then I was saying to the women doing my intake interview at the PND project that I don't want to be in a therapy group because I worked/ volunteered as a group facilitator and she... looked at me oddly.

If you do ever have the resources to make it to Faslane, I'd love to meet you - I would love to get back to Faslane demo-ing and haven't, post-babies. And obviously I feel guilty about that. But there's plenty else to do about Trident apart from showing off and sitting in roads.

[nitoda]

I need to do less, not more, and to work on allowing myself to feel ok with that.
Wholeheartedly concur with that thought - if you saw my entry earlier today you will know that I mean it! Looking after yourself is *the* most important thing for a mum to do in my book as you can't look after anyone else if you don't. :-)

[nitoda]

Oh, and another thing. I remember it being impressed upon me when my babies were young and I expressed similar views about taking too much and giving too little that I would have opportunities to give at another time. People had opportunities to give to me now and I would, on other occasions, have opportunities to give too. It doesn't have to balance. And certainly not over a week or a year or a few years! We used to pass the baby clothes around with no thought of getting them back, but sometimes, when a second baby was born, things would come back around again ... or else newer things would come around - and when we had finished with something it was put into the kitty for others to use. I don't think I've *ever* felt as much a part of a supportive community than at that time when my babies were small and I was part of NCT. I was certainly closer to other women then than at any other time in my life.

[tiggsybabes.livejournal.com]

You do far more than many people. I decided that I didn't need the homestart lady when she finally came. Partly because I was so much better & not at the just surviving each day stage & partly because I didn't gel with her & found it hard work. I felt like I was the volunteer & was helping her.