PTSD

[ailbhe]

So I went to the psychologist and yay hurray you know all the stuff I've been learning to deal with and cope with and not focus on for the past three years? Yup, that. We didn't today, but from the next session, we need to ensure that we have a session at least once a week, and, well, focus on it, dredge it up bring it to the fore, relive it, all that good stuff.

You have no idea how much I want to opt out of my life right now. I want to find some other life and live that instead, only with my girls.

Yes, yes, I know. But I want an easy way out.

And I'd like to stop losing weight again. 10 stone in early January, 8 stone in mid January, 10 stone at the end of February, now 9 stone. What's going on, please?

Comments

[jemstone.livejournal.com]

*offers hug*

Speaking from my own experiences, I personally dread having to go over all the things that lead to my own wonderful form of emotional shellshock. They hurt, and they leave me in bad places. But quite seriously, I know I need to do it. I know it's the only way to get better.

I don't envy you your position. But I do want you to know that I have hope for you. *support*

[rmc28]

All I can offer is encouragement, and that though this will be damn hard, it will be better on the other side.

[kightp.livejournal.com]

I found going through the old evils much less terrifying than anticipating going through them. Once I got several sessions into that particular phase of therapy and realized that no new terror was going to jump out and claim me just because I was looking at the old ones, the healing went far faster than I'd ever imagined.

YMMV and all, but there is hope.

As for the weight loss - you're still breast-feeding both girls, yes? Their nutritional demands must be growing; are you getting enough nourishment for them and you, too?

[ailbhe]

I never stop eating. Truly.

I actually have a feeling that this is the weight I'm going to settle at; I did after Linnea was born. But the sudden loss of 20% in early January freaked me out so I'm *watching* it through narrowed eyes.

[barakta]

Nothing helpful to say other than thinking of you.

[dreamalynn.livejournal.com]

I also have no advice but want to say that you're in my thoughts, every day.

[squishsplash.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[micheinnz.livejournal.com]

This _is_ the easy way out.

Seriously.

*big hugs*

[k425.livejournal.com]

Weightloss - you've been ill. And possibly your scales are broken. Mine can give me half a stone in a day.