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ailbheIt took me half an hour this morning to do my online catchup for the morning. That's just ten hours' worth of updates, since I stopped online stuff at about 10:30 pm last night.
I think perhaps I need to do something about this.
However, after that, I got the dining room and kitchen beautifully clean, myself and Linnea properly dressed and teeth and hair brushed, dishwasher and laundry sorted out (two loads washed, one brought in off the line and put away, one hung out to dry), lunch made, after a fashion, toys tidied up several times... I had a remarkably productive day until about 2 pm, because at some point during the morning the Homestart person came, to assess me so she can assign me a volunteer.
She stayed an hour and a half. I spent the whole time talking. I think it's a long time since I've been able to talk about the birth to anyone, since everyone we know in real life has heard it all before or isn't the right kind of friend to get all the details. So that was ok.
It was a bit strange how much she wanted to restrict Linnea though - she helpfully stopped her doing all sorts of things that it wouldn't occur to me to prevent. Mopping a spill inefficiently, for example, or getting glue on the table after I gave her glue and felt and paper to keep her amused while I talked and ignored her, or putting all the pinenuts on the table rather than eating them (about a tablespoon was the "all"). I thought Linnea was doing quite well for an ignored toddler while there were adults talking and leaving her out of things.
The visitor also kept thinking that I'm depressed and that my birth-related mental illness is depression, because, I assume, she's never heard of PTSD. And she assumed, when I breastfed Linnea, that I was trying to stop before the new baby came. But she wasn't unpleasant about it. She did try to get me to say that it was widespread hospital negligence that led to my birth problems, but I didn't quite. I think it's a bigger problem than just that one hospital - the "first time mother as clueless patient in medical situation" attitude was a huge part of it, and that's thingy, endemic I think is the word.
So anyway, I get assigned a visitor who comes weekly. Obviously Wednesday mornings (Tiggers Toddlers) and Thursday mornings (NCT Coffee) are out, so we'll see what other days crop up. I'd prefer it not to be Friday mornings, because if I ever do go to the singing at the library again, which I might if Linnea continues to adapt to the organised group singing at Tiggers, it's then.
So yes: Today I stepped up and asked for help, and when it was forthcoming, I didn't reject it. That's good.
I think perhaps I need to do something about this.
However, after that, I got the dining room and kitchen beautifully clean, myself and Linnea properly dressed and teeth and hair brushed, dishwasher and laundry sorted out (two loads washed, one brought in off the line and put away, one hung out to dry), lunch made, after a fashion, toys tidied up several times... I had a remarkably productive day until about 2 pm, because at some point during the morning the Homestart person came, to assess me so she can assign me a volunteer.
She stayed an hour and a half. I spent the whole time talking. I think it's a long time since I've been able to talk about the birth to anyone, since everyone we know in real life has heard it all before or isn't the right kind of friend to get all the details. So that was ok.
It was a bit strange how much she wanted to restrict Linnea though - she helpfully stopped her doing all sorts of things that it wouldn't occur to me to prevent. Mopping a spill inefficiently, for example, or getting glue on the table after I gave her glue and felt and paper to keep her amused while I talked and ignored her, or putting all the pinenuts on the table rather than eating them (about a tablespoon was the "all"). I thought Linnea was doing quite well for an ignored toddler while there were adults talking and leaving her out of things.
The visitor also kept thinking that I'm depressed and that my birth-related mental illness is depression, because, I assume, she's never heard of PTSD. And she assumed, when I breastfed Linnea, that I was trying to stop before the new baby came. But she wasn't unpleasant about it. She did try to get me to say that it was widespread hospital negligence that led to my birth problems, but I didn't quite. I think it's a bigger problem than just that one hospital - the "first time mother as clueless patient in medical situation" attitude was a huge part of it, and that's thingy, endemic I think is the word.
So anyway, I get assigned a visitor who comes weekly. Obviously Wednesday mornings (Tiggers Toddlers) and Thursday mornings (NCT Coffee) are out, so we'll see what other days crop up. I'd prefer it not to be Friday mornings, because if I ever do go to the singing at the library again, which I might if Linnea continues to adapt to the organised group singing at Tiggers, it's then.
So yes: Today I stepped up and asked for help, and when it was forthcoming, I didn't reject it. That's good.
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-06 08:18 pm (UTC)I don't recall when Homestrat visited me, but I'm still waiting for my visits to start. I did have a phone call a couple of weeks back saying they hadn't forgotten me, but that no-one is yet available to fit in with the times I'm free & / or suitable for what I want from them. Hopefully it'll take less than the 15 months I've waited so far for NHS counselling ...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 09:07 am (UTC)I've never heard of homestart before. It sounds interesting. What do you expect your volunteer will do?