C-Section: "Is that what you want to do?"
May. 26th, 2006 02:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ailbheMy midwife came and I was talking about getting more stressed as we get nearer to C-Day and she asked "Is that what you want to do?"
I burst into tears.
She doesn't like the idea of a section. She's going to do the research I'm too sick in the head to do, and find out what the risks of vaginal birth really are, and why people are advising a section. She also wants the contact info of a midwife who offered to talk to me about delivery after severe tearing because I was never able to call her, but my midwife can because she doesn't get my panic attacks.
Oh god. I am hopeful and afraid and very, very shaken. Very, very shaken. But nothing but good can come of this: either my beloved midwife will discover that a trial of labour is safe enough for me, or that it would come with risks I am not willing to take, and at least I won't just be taking people's word for it without in-depth information. She's going to find out why I'm supposedly not allowed to go into labour and have contractions, and what the fears of damage during delivery itself are, and whether something like slightly early induction to avoid a large baby might help, and...
Oh god. She's going to ask actual questions about all the options, and then she's going to come back to me with the information, and talk me through it, and let me make the decision.
I am so afraid.
I burst into tears.
She doesn't like the idea of a section. She's going to do the research I'm too sick in the head to do, and find out what the risks of vaginal birth really are, and why people are advising a section. She also wants the contact info of a midwife who offered to talk to me about delivery after severe tearing because I was never able to call her, but my midwife can because she doesn't get my panic attacks.
Oh god. I am hopeful and afraid and very, very shaken. Very, very shaken. But nothing but good can come of this: either my beloved midwife will discover that a trial of labour is safe enough for me, or that it would come with risks I am not willing to take, and at least I won't just be taking people's word for it without in-depth information. She's going to find out why I'm supposedly not allowed to go into labour and have contractions, and what the fears of damage during delivery itself are, and whether something like slightly early induction to avoid a large baby might help, and...
Oh god. She's going to ask actual questions about all the options, and then she's going to come back to me with the information, and talk me through it, and let me make the decision.
I am so afraid.