Ten years meme

[ailbhe]

Ten years ago I was planning a wedding and very slowly gaining weight and becoming less ill, after dropping to 7st and taking up recreational blackouts. My arms were not great but I could do most things I needed to most of the time. I was 24 and a half. We lived in this house and had done for over a year - maybe almost two years? I'd had to quit my job due to stress and illness.

Five years ago I had two small children and was constantly busy and exhausted. I was getting over post-natal depression and PTSD and Rob was depressed. Every fortnight for time off and a break I went to the True Food market to buy a fortnight's groceries all by myself. We were part of a local home ed group which met up regularly. Linnea looked JUST like Astrid!

One year ago we were reeling from Astrid's breathing trouble and so on.

Yesterday we tidied the house, had the French teacher over, did some art with Lucy, went to swimming lessons, posted a parcel, had pocketmoney shopping, did a little gardening, I went to the doctor and got a referral for blood tests to check for autoimmune things like rheumatism and celiac disease, we did some laundry, and I got very very sad about my useless body which hates me.

Today I was exhausted all day and Rob came home from work early. Tomorrow should be better because I'm not overdoing it today.

In one year we might have a slightly bigger house, because we're hoping to convert the attic. I might also have a better plan for selling my art; the last year was a washout because of constantly being on alert for calling an ambulance if Astrid stopped breathing. Not restful.

In five years Linnea will be 14 and Emer will be 10 and Astrid will be almost 8. It's almost impossible to imagine. Whatever I'm doing will depend enormously on what they need. I hope we'll still be in the same house, I hope we'll have managed to install solar panels and proper greywater use, I hope we're healthy and happy. But I can't tell what we'll be doing with our lives. Far too many variables.

Comments

[pauamma]

and I got very very sad about my useless body which hates me.

Not being in your head, I will take your word for it that you got sad about your body, but I don't believe that it's useless or that it hates you.

[ailbhe]

Well, my brain keeps trying to kill me, my stomach won't let me eat normal food, my arms have RSI, my Private Parts are a complete mess due to That Obstetrician, my hips hate walking and stairs and require orthotic insoles due to pregnancy damage, and now the GP thinks I have rheumatism as well. It's not very *kind* to me.

[pauamma]

Hmm, yes. Although some of it isn't your body's fault, or yours. But I think the brainweasels are misrepresenting the extent of it.

[irishkate.livejournal.com]

Scared me there for a second - I was glancing through this and missed the "In five years" and just saw "Linnea will be 14" etc. And I thought WHAT? I mean WHAT WHAT?

And then I spotted the extra piece of the line and calmed down!

Here's to a good future.

[ailbhe]

In ten years Linnea will be 19.

[irishkate.livejournal.com]

I wonder where she'll be - will she be in college? Will she have taken a year off and gone backpacking around the world? Au Pairing in Italy? Will she be finished college? Working in a job having decided the best education was an apprenticeship style one?

The possibilities are endless!

[ailbhe]

I'm hoping she won't be building a fortification and subsistence farm against the coming doom.

[irishkate.livejournal.com]

Oh - no - she'll have designed a system for returning the earth's temperature and atmosphere to pre industrial settings and be working to get it running worldwide...

or something....worst case..

[the-changeling.livejournal.com]

...and Hugh will be 18.

I can't process it. :-p

[the-changeling.livejournal.com]

Me too!

[venta.livejournal.com]

Nice idea for the ten year thing, I might write mine up tonight.

Though mine is going to be very samey - at least with children you have a guaranteed rapidly-changing thing in your life!

Bringing up three children is a huge endeavour that I can't even begin to imagine; I'm always very impressed at your attitude to doing it.

[ailbhe]

Gosh. I wonder what my attitude is? Other than supine, obv.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Um... hard to be specific, now you've called me on it! I think the closest I could come in one word is "reactive". So, in five years you'll be doing something depending on what your offspring needs, you haven't got their life mapped out for them. I think in lots of small ways you've given this impression, too - not exactly "letting them do what they want", which is quite different, but giving them a say in picking their path through the day.

[ailbhe]

Aha - Child Led, verging on Autonomous at times. It's an instinct and a philosophy, for me. One has to start off thinking of children as just as much people as adults are (hugely discouraged!), but the rest is straightforward enough.

[browngirl.livejournal.com]

I like this meme, and I'm cheering you onwards!

[ailbhe]

Thigns are growing in my garden.

[juliet]

Greywater! I would love to do Something with our greywater setup but with a garden the size of ours (8m x 5m) none of the straightforward-ish DIY options are really feasible. Not without giving up important other garden-functions, anyway. I have not looked into less-straightforward options. We decided against solar for reasonable-reasons but I'd like to revisit that in 5 yrs when the tech has moved on again.