Coming to terms

I'm beginning to come to terms with this.

On the one hand, I honestly thought - and was told, by several people who ought to know - that I had a real chance of my next child being born normally, without masses of intervention, without over 36 hours of labour, like normal people do it.

On the other, I have never met someone who had a c-section that resulted in as much physical trauma as the vaginal delivery I had did, and I've certainly never met someone whose c-section had such a dramatic long-term effect on their overall health.

I've heard a few things about planned c-sections which sound fantastic, though the whole no food bit is unpleasant. I'm sure it must be easier to get a spinal right first time without contractions every 2 minutes, for example. And then there's the complications with the catheter, which just wouldn't happen with a c-section (you don't want to know. Trust me). I don't like catheters.

I saw women who'd had c-sections walking around the maternity ward a day or two after delivering. Most of them were fit to leave 3 days after the birth of their baby.

Linnea was never intended to be an only child. I thought I might have to go through all this again, and I was resigned to that. Even I had thought that I would do it the hard way only once more, and request c-sections if the next one was just as bad.

So I'm coming to terms with this.