So Michael Jackson is dead

I knew this before I went to bed last night, of course. But what I'm surprised by is that I care. I put on TMF this morning and it's all MJ music videos, of course. We never had MTV or anything similar when I was growing up so I'd never seen most of them before. The video for "Heal the World" made me cry, which is probably partially hormones.

When I was a teenager I briefly tried to fancy Michael Jackson, because teenage girls are supposed to fancy famous people, and I somehow never did. I thought I'd try to develop a crush on Michael Jackson because I felt rather sorry for him and liked a lot of the music I'd heard.

Didn't work. Closest I ever managed to a celebrity crush was Helena Bonham Carter but I really only ever managed crushes on people I knew.

There was a music video on this morning in which MJ was still medium-dark. I think the Thriller album had a picture of him looking like that, with a lion cub. But I'd never seen him moving-while-black before.

His life seems to have been really desperately screwed up the whole way along. Poor guy.