Me and my spoons

For the past 3 months or so, I have been using The Spoon Theory to describe to myself how I manage my life now that I'm in pain all the time. It's a good theory, or illustration, or whatever it is. And, you know, I don't generally look sick, which makes it doubly good.

Sitting and reading uses only millispoons, and taking 60mg of codeine gives me extra spoons, but is bad for my baby. Walking around for a day uses lots of spoons, but cheers me up so much that it's worth it if I can do it on a Friday so that Rob can mind the baby the day after while I recover.

Going away for a week's enjoyable and relaxing holiday with minimal moving around or activity of any kind, to Sweden, used up all my spoons, every day, and ran me into debt on the days with flights. That's why I'm not going to the funeral, even if I'm over this virus or whatever. I can't. It would mean Rob had to care for me, my baby, and his own grief, all at once, and that's not fair.

Spoons, eh?