http://djelibeybi.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] djelibeybi.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] ailbhe 2005-10-14 07:08 am (UTC)

Stopping all that stuff is good.

Starting a healthier, happier life is better. BOTH you and Rob are responsible for your own words and actions.

When G was first struggling with alcoholism, I took on more. He did less. This grew until he was completely dependant upon me. Even to the point of walking/carrying him upstairs to go to bed. I told no-one and defended him, citing work, illness, stress, even the children. People were not fooled. No-one accused me of not caring for him.

The only thing that keeps me from the guilty nightmares is the statement from the Intensive Care specialist: "You never forced him to drink"

I *am* a strong person and so are you. You know what's right, what's important, what's urgent. Sleep deprivation can throw your judgement right off course and make you unreasonable and "un-Ailbhe". Same goes for Rob.

I recommend making lists with each other. Agree what those important things are - Linnea, health, employment, fun. Concentrate on all the things that make them work. Then ignore everything else - especially voices, real or imaginary.

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