On the whole traumatic birth thing again...

[ailbhe]

From http://www.psychnet-uk.com/dsm_iv/female_orgasmic_disorder.htm :

Female Orgasmic Disorder occurs when there is a significant delay or total absence of orgasm associated with the sexual activity.

That bit's ok.

This condition must cause a problem in the relationship with the sexual partner in order to be defined as a disorder.

THAT BIT ENRAGES ME BEYOND BELIEF.

Comments

[ailbhe]

The whole thing does explain why once I stopped being suicidal everyone decided it was all better now. Clearly I need to be more distressed about it. I am so, so tired of being distressed about things in order to get them treated as real problems.

[songster.livejournal.com]

Yup. I can see why they want to avoid medicalising things that aren't causing anyone any distress, though.

The problem is that once you try to draw that line, you're essentially asking the patient to diagnose themselves - how distressed is "enough"? You end up not treating the people that put up and shut up, and (perhaps) wasting resources on people who have less severe problems but just complain louder. Also, even though the diagnostic criteria are drafted in as non-sexist a manner as possible, with identical wording, it ends up institutionalising society's sexism.

[ailbhe]

Well, for me, this *is* a "less severe problem." It's just that it has been going on for six years now, and isn't getting better. Given the hassle we had to get them to investigate "in constant severe pain," and the further hassle for "in unbearable pain during sex," I don't fancy my chances this time.

Unless I send Rob in with a big MY WIFE IS DEFECTIVE I WILL DIVORCE HER rant on, but I can't see him managing it convincingly. He's a lousy liar.

[songster.livejournal.com]

Hmm, in your case I suspect you'd get pushed about from pillar to post - i.e. whether it's a physical problem or a mental one. DSM-IV only applies to the latter: I have no idea what the criteria are for diagnosing a physiological problem with female sexual response, nor where to look it up. Nor, unfortunately, whether anything can be done about it in either eventuality. :-/

[ailbhe]

I've been *told* there are no further physical reasons for problems, which I'm not at all sure I believe but is in my notes. But I think getting them to recognise that it's a problem *at all* might be very difficult. "You must expect some discomfort after childbirth," for example.

[songster.livejournal.com]

Well, I guess it's worth a shot if you have the energy >.<

The boxes they'll want ticked appear to be:

1) How long it's been going on (to catch DSM-V proposed criteria)
2) Whether it happens every time you have sex (likewise)
3) Whether it's a problem when masturbating as well as having sex (the "is Rob just crap" test)

... worth pointing out here that there wasn't a problem (so far as I know) prior to L being born.

4) Does it cause you or Rob distress (may be best if you can go in as a joint appointment and say it causes you both distress?).

They'll want to rule out physical causes (do you have some communication from the obs/gynae people to say there's no physical reason for problems?) and any drug interactions (antidepressants etc.)

[ailbhe]

Heh. 1) Six years, as far as we know. Not that we were able to TRY for the first two of those. 2) It fails to happen, haha. Yes. 3) I haven't even bothered attempting self-stimulation for years because it's so completely and utterly pointless and miserable-making. 4) No, we're far too tired of and accustomed to it to find it actively distressing. I get sad sometimes - and very occasionally angry - but not much any more. What's the point?

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

"Sad" and "occasionally angry" means "distress".

The problem here is that you're British, and the DSM criteria are written largely by Americans.

When you read "distress", imagine the AMERICAN definition of "distress", not the BRITISH one.

[ailbhe]

I'm not British! I'm operating within a British system though.

[deborah_c]

That sounds horribly familiar. My GP recently took Bad Hormonal Stuff Happening Again as "oh, you're just depressed, have some pills". I had to scream quite a lot to get something done about it, and fortunately was able to bypass her. (In her defence, she's normally quite good, but not this time.)